Where to Keep Condoms

keep-calm-and-carry-condomsIf you’re a red-blooded male, you might be one of the millions who’s always prepared. You’ve got one of your trusty condoms in your wallet, a couple stashed in your backpack and some tucked inside your glove compartment.

If that’s the case, you’re doing it wrong. Very, very wrong.

You need to store your condoms in a cool, dry place. Heat and humidity will wreak havoc on the condom’s latex over time, leaving your condoms prone to breakage at the worst possible moment. The only time you want to have them in your wallet or glove compartment is when you know you’re going to use them that night; otherwise, your body heat is going to gradually degrade the latex on the ones in your wallet, and the oven-like environment your car turns into on a hot day is going to break down those kept in your glove compartment.

If you keep your wallet in your back pants pocket, then that makes it a doubly bad place to store a condom as the friction from sitting and putting pressure on it could also cause damage. If you want to carry one on your person, a jacket pocket would be a better choice—but again, just slip a condom in your pocket when you know you’ll be using it that night. You don’t want to be carrying the same old condom around with you for weeks or months at a time. If you do like to carry one with you at all times for “just in case”, then make sure you replace it with a fresh condom frequently.

So where do you want to store your condoms? Anyplace in your home that doesn’t rise above room temperature will work just fine. While the best way to store your condoms is to keep them in their original box, that’s not strictly necessary as long as you’re keeping heat and humidity out of the equation. Put them in a drawer of your dresser or night stand, tucked discreetly on a bookshelf, or anyplace else that’s not prone to heat and humidity.

Although you want to keep them in a cool place, the refrigerator or freezer are too cold, which could also lead to damaging the latex.

While we’re on the subject, make sure that the condoms you’re using haven’t gone past their expiration date. Yes, just like milk and bad romances, condoms come with an expiration date and you don’t want to take unnecessary chances with your sexual health or your partner’s by pushing your luck.

How to Put on a Condom

how-to-put-on-a-condomPutting on a condom is a skill that most of us take for granted—we’ve been sexually active for years and using condoms during sex is second nature. You are using condoms, right? Good. Just checking. Anyway, over time, we might get into sloppy habits, assume we know exactly what we’re doing while missing a step, or just plain get complacent. So here’s a brief refresher on how to properly wrap that rascal before you and your partner get down to a serious love groove.

First, make sure that you’ve got lubrication on hand. Many condoms are manufactured with their own lube, but it’s often not quite enough for intercourse. Now that you’ve gotten your lubrication situation squared away, make sure that your penis is fully erect. One of the most commonly raised objections to wearing condoms is that putting one on destroys the mood. But you can have some fun with it. Putting on your condom can be an audience participation event, so if you’re not quite at full mast, be sure to invite your partner to give you a hand.

Okay, you’re standing tall and proud. The next step is to actually put this thing on. Place the rolled condom over your penis, pinch shut the tip that serves as the reservoir, and unroll the entire length of the condom over your penis. If you find it very difficult to roll the condom all the way down the shaft of your penis, it might be because you’re using a condom that’s too small. Have a look at the size chart to make sure you’re getting one that is the right fit for you. Make sure that you haven’t got any air trapped in the condom—that can lead to breakage and defeat the purpose of our endeavors. Once you’ve completed this step, your condom should be snug and secure, ensuring that you’re all set and ready for hot, safe sex.

Condoms are one of the simplest prophylactics ever developed and one of the most effective STD defense measures. They’re easy to put on and with the types of rubber used in today’s condoms, it doesn’t feel like you’re going in wearing a wetsuit. Be safe, have fun, and always remember your condoms.